I'm up, at 2:10 a.m. when I should probably be sleeping. I just watched about three (four?) hours of television. DVR's a blessing and a curse. Laguna Beach is scary. I really hope its not real. Well, it just makes me more glad I grew up in Brooklyn. My hood is really real. Haha. Kitchen Confidential was money -- it's got that guy from Wedding Crashers, the rugby-playing boyfriend, as the lead. They packed an awful lot into the first episode, but as the plots find a rhythm it should become quite enjoyable.

I purchased Leak Bros. - Waterworld off iTunes the other day, the second time I downloaded an album legally. (The first was Toby Lightman - Little Things. ... Aaaaand I'm gay.) The Leak Bros. album, which pairs up underground rappers Cage and Tame One, is a wonderfully trippy concept album about a drug-related theme park and smoking cigarettes or blunts dipped in embalming fluid (leak). It sounds crazy, and you know what? It is. But it's awesome hip hop. Check the "La di da di" homage on "Druggie Fresh" that features Tame One and bells that will reverberate in your nightmares.

I could go into depth on this record, but I'm no music reviewer and I haven't listened to the album enough. But I know what I like, and what you should, so you'll have to trust me on this one.

Days since The Minstrel Show has shipped: Seven

Hiphopsite and UPS, you're on the clock.

This is from my notebook, written Sept. 7 at 4:56 in the a.m. It's a lil' late, but this is from a kid who waited four years before really broaching that whole 9/11 deal.

My response to the whole Hurrican Katrina thing troubles me. I think I'm desensitized to these large-scale disasters because a lack of any personal connection keeps them from being real. It's fucked up but I missed out on the one chance I had to really get my ass kicked, only because I happened to be starting college when I did (Fall '01 --ed.).

Maybe it's hard for me to bring my vision down from some large scale to the small scale of a singular event. There's so many other problems in my hood, my state, my country, my planet that need fixing, and sometimes it feels like we only do shit when something big happens. Like, "fuck the everyday, let's do something now."

But I'm guilty of that, too. And it's a scary feeling, believing that your emotional core is dormant and waiting for some event big enough or close enough to crack it open. I feel helpless as fuck, but I've been too busy figuring out me to find the time to really help anyone else. And while that's understandable, it doesn't make me any less of a douchebag. Is it wrong to be taking advantage of opportunities in front of me because they're there, and other people aren't getting them? Or should I be constantly working to make sure everyone else has those opportunities? That's self-ish versus self-less, I suppose.

Isn't that what the Army's fighting for in Iraq? It might be, or at least that's the answer that makes the most sense. I hope Gabe gets back. That's a fucked up concept to think about, friends dying. Death in general, really. Because at base, it just means someone's not around any more. And I'm scared by that because I seem to deal with that well. It's different when you know there at least can be a next time. Sometimes I think I'm numb in a lot of ways. I hope I'm wrong.

This Q&A with Kenny Irons is highly humorous. I'm late on this -- it's from June 28, and I caught the link from SLAM -- but on the off chance you haven't read it, you should.




And I realize I'm stalling.

The real updates might come someday.

It's Sept. 11. For the 22nd time in my life and fourth since 2001. I still haven't figured out my reaction. I think I held only my first deep conversation on the topic today, and it was over AIM, so it doesn't count. It's a weird feeling. Maybe it always will be.

It's too late in the day for me to compose an entry that's weighted correctly, and tomorrow, as unfortunate as this is, an entry would be, well not irrelevant, but no longer timely. So I'll instead redirect you to the article I wrote for MLB.com today:

Yankees recall Sept. 11 tragedy

Never Forget.

I don’t know what I think about this Kanye album (Late Registration). I keep listening to it over and over and I’m able to do that which has got to be good, but it doesn’t feel like it’s sinking in. even a little bit. I don’t know why. The beats are ridiculous in places and the vibe is definitely chilled out pretty good. It’s such a different sound than everything else out there, and combined with The Minstrel Show drop date coming up, this could change the sound of hip hop. But truth be told, that’s putting a lot of faith in people and their musical tastes, and with the kind of the stuff that sells, I don’t buy it. Well, I do, but they won’t. and that saddens me, but what can you do?

I know I haven't been updating lately, but I've been busy with work and either unmotivated or without the time to write when I'm not... I'm working on a major update. Promise.

Sash, officially on the record, officially:

helios483: i mean personally
helios483: i could be wrong
helios483: but if given the opportunity to go to Game 7 of the World Series or have sex
helios483: i would take Game 7